


don't fall with the rain

by Take_Me_To_My_Fragile_Dreams



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Implied Levi/Eren Yeager, Levi Needs a Hug, M/M, Minor Violence, POV Eren Yeager, POV Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Thunderstorms, Titan Eren Yeager, brief description of an anxiety attack, mentions of acwnr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 05:30:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3966184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Take_Me_To_My_Fragile_Dreams/pseuds/Take_Me_To_My_Fragile_Dreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An encounter with a storm while on a scouting mission leaves Levi less than calm when Eren and the rest of his squad is separated. Struck with flashbacks of a field of blood and titans, with the eyes of his dead friends staring back at him, Levi fights desperately against the thought that maybe he would find Eren in a similar position.</p>
            </blockquote>





	don't fall with the rain

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a couple days ago when I was already half asleep and have since attempted to make that less obvious but I apologize if this is still crap ;;
> 
> Also  
> don't ask me when this takes place because I have no idea *hides*

The storm came fast, as most do, with clouds a slate gray that blackened out the sky. The color leached the world of other hues, taking the cheery yellow of the sun away to be replaced with a dreadful darkness that did little more but keep them even more on edge. Storms reduced sight, which couldn't be more dangerous with titans roaming around. Of course, with the reduced light of the sun, most were slower, and less likely to cause casualties, but any soldier could be killed if not careful, especially in a storm.

"Springer, Blouse!" Levi barked, glancing over his shoulder at the two in question. "Tell the squads to ready the wagons. We're going to need to find shelter soon."

They nodded, giving a firm "sir!" before parting from the formation, one going left and the other right. They were barely out of sight before the first fall of rain began, fat drops marking the earth in tiny flecks. Underneath him, his horse's hooves pounded into the same earth, the soil dusty and dry with little vegetation. It would get dangerous if the rain got worse, making footholds slippery and the chances of slipping increase. But slowing wasn't an option either.

Tugging his hood up over his head, Levi scowled, beginning to feel the first touches of the storm. Slowly the rain fell over them, the clouds that had seemed to be giving chase racing ahead to curtain them in a downpour that only made the ride all the more miserable. Wet clothes chafed and stuck uncomfortably to skin, not to mention the fact that they were cold. There was also the problem of rust. While designed to withhold most wear and tear, their gear was not waterproof, and if left to the elements for long periods of time their blades would become dull and useless.

"Keep your heads down and stay by me!" He shouted, the words nearly torn away with the howl of the wind. The pitter patter of the rain was gone now, the steady drops beginning to feel more like a roaring wave as stinging drops fell against their bodies like the lashes of a whip. Slowly, visibility vanished, until Levi could barely see ahead through his squint. Even the dull pound of hooves was drowned out, the mix of wind and falling water too loud to hear anything else.

Glancing back at his squad, Levi counted heads, just barely able to make out numbers. "Is everyone here?" He had to practically scream, falling into stride beside Jean.

The blonde nodded, a hand holding his hood over his face in a desperate attempt to shield his eyes from the onslaught of rain. "Everyone's present, sir!"

 _Thank Sina._ "I want everyone to pair off! If worse comes to worse and we get separated I want you to stay with your partner!" He peered back at his squad, barely able to make our their pale faces. "Kirstein! Reiss! Stay together! Same goes for Ackerman and Arlert! As for Jeager--you're with me!"

Giving small nods of agreement they shifted position, moving shoulder to shoulder with their assigned partner. Eren, who he had barely been able to see at the back, slipped through the sudden gap of space, moving forward to ride astride Levi's mount.

"Sir!" He shouted, worried green eyes straining against the water hitting his face. "What about Connie and Sasha?"

"They should be with the other's," Levi answered, giving a shake of his head. "We can't do anything for them."

Eren nodded, though the Corporal didn't need to see the dissatisfied twist of his mouth to see that he didn’t like it. Which was good, since there seemed to be a sudden swath of fog joining the mix. Forced to slow to a hesitant canter, Levi strained both his ears and sight for not only danger but shelter as well. Stuck in a storm that drowned out most noise and seemed to be set on blinding them, a bad feeling began bloom out from Levi's consciousness.

He'd encountered many storms since his first expedition--weather was unpredictable after all, and sometimes these things couldn't be helped, but this storm seemed eerily reminiscent of the one that had resulted in his friends deaths.

Glancing over at Eren, who was bent forward over his horse in an effort to shield himself against the rain, Levi couldn't help but worry. Already, he had lost sight of the rest of his squad, a glance back showing nothing but roiling mist and murky blackness. He couldn't even use his hearing to check to see if they were following behind, the sound of rain, wind and distant thunder drowning all other noises out. They were on their own for now, and Levi could only hope that when all was done he would come back to a full squad.

"Sir!" Eren called, glancing over at him as lightning flashed in the distance. It cast shadows across his face, painting him in blacks and whites for a brief moment. "How are we going to find shelter? I thought the nearest forest was another hour's ride!"

Levi grimaced. _It was_. "We've got no choice," he answered, shaking his head as a crash of thunder threatened to drown out his words. "We have to keep going."

Eren muttered something, the words torn from his lips by the wind to be thrown behind them. The worried look he gave the sky made it clear what he was thinking though as another flash of lightning speared the blackness around them. _We're likely to die before that._

Dead because of a storm, how ironic. The thought was more sobering than funny, however, and as another, seemingly closer flash of light bloomed out around them, Levi wondered if Eren would survive a lightning strike.

Hanji would find out, if they had their way.

Nearly snorting at that thought, Levi closed his eyes. With the way the rain was falling he could barely keep them open unless he pressed his face into his mount's mane, the falling water painful and irritating against his iris'. It unnerved him, being unable to see or hear anything coming, and Levi found himself forcing his eyes back open in a futile effort. Danger came upon those unsuspecting and he could not-- _would not_ \--let death claim another of his squad, especially not Eren. He had lost too many already.

As if hearing his desperation, the rain seemed to let up some, softening to less stinging blows. It was enough for him to raise his head, and it was enough to see the straggling trees beginning to surface around them.

They were almost there.

"Eren!" Levi called, head turning to glance at the boy. "We need to--"

A roar of thunder tore through his words, seeming to shake the ground as it went. It made the horses' ears pin flat, their bodies shivering with the restraint it took to keep going and stay on track. It was nothing, however, compared to the lightning.

As blinding as the sun it zigzagged through the sky, lighting up the area around them in a painful flash. The crack of a tree splitting in two and the smell of fire accompanied it, and Levi had barely a moment to blink against the white of his vision before a roar, louder than anything he'd ever heard before and seemingly angrier than even Eren's Titan filled his ears. It was deafening in its volume, silencing the scream of his horse as she reared with a terror filled cry, nearly knocking him off with the force. Giving a startled shout of his own, Levi made a wild grab for the reins. He'd raised his hands to his ears on instinct, body acting without thought and all he could think was _stupid, so fucking stupid_ as they were suddenly tearing through the woods at full speed, the reins up around his horse's ears.

Clinging to her neck and making an aborted grab towards the leather, Levi strained. If he didn't grab them soon, the sharp movements of her head would dislodge the reins and possibly fall forward. A scenario such as that could only end badly, with either the leather getting caught on something in passing or on her hooves, tripping her and sending them both crashing to the ground.

"Come on," he hissed, forcing himself forward despite his unbalanced position. Just a little... Gasping, his hand closed around the leather, pulling the reins back into his grasp. Slowly, he pushed himself up, sliding back into the saddle and struggling to right his leg position. His boots slipped against the wet metal, and he squeezed his legs as he forced his heels back and down, steadying himself for what he was about to do.

Gritting his teeth in determination he caught the reins in both hands, shortening the material and sitting back in the saddle as he pulled. The horse resisted at first, tossing her head angrily and side stepping.

He wasn't having any of it.

Pressing his leg into her side he forced her into a wide circle, turning her back the way they'd came. She shook and snorted, but eventually, after several more twists and turns, she seemed to calm, allowing him to draw her to a stop. It was dangerous, but Levi couldn't help it. They had gone off track and who knew where they were. They were still near the woods of course, and all he had to do was turn and head in the vaguest directions to come to safety, but Eren was still out there and the chances of him still having a horse were 50/50.  
Shaking his head against the sobering thoughts, Levi spurred his horse back into a canter, leaning low over her back to go faster. Horse or not, he would find Eren. He just hoped when he did, the sight of blood would not follow him.

* * *

Eren cursed, crouched down next to his horse and drenched to the bone. They'd fallen in the panic of the storm, having slid in the mud and skidded sideways. It had damaged his gear, ripping one of the boxes of blades from his hip and breaking one of the canisters of gas on the other. What was most debilitating of all, however, was the bloodied legs his mount was sporting, his weak cries telling Eren everything he needed to know. His horse was as good as dead and he would not be riding to safety any time soon.

Letting another curse fall from his lips, Eren's fist hit the ground. It sunk in slightly, coming back stained with mud and grass, and Eren couldn't help a scream of anger as he did it again. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!"

And to make matters worse, Levi had disappeared! Goddess only knew if he was safe, injured or even dead and Eren was hopeless to find out. With no gear, no horse and no help in sight he was stranded in the open, a perfect target for predators.

It was only a matter of time.

* * *

"Dammit," Levi hissed, "how big is this fucking field?!" They'd ran for what had to have been at least ten minutes, and with no trace of Eren. It was making dread well up in Levi despite his best efforts. Horses could run fast when terrified, especially military horses, and Levi's was no exception. He knew that they could have easily covered as long as a half hours worth of riding if not more in the time it took to calm down his mount and turn back around, but every minute put Eren more and more at risk.

What was even worse, was that the rain had let up, only the most remaining, which meant that scents would no longer be washed away and if Eren was stranded somewhere, it would be easy for titans to smell him. Shaking his head, Levi urged his horse on faster, promising a long rest once everything was done.

It was too similar to the day he'd lost Farlan and Isabel. First they'd parted, then he'd turned back, thinking he'd get there in time--and then he'd found them, dead in a circle of titans and human remains.  
Would he even get such a thing with Eren? Or would he be one of the uncollected? Assumed dead from a lack of corpse.

A flash of green eyes darted through his mind, so vibrant and alive and so like Isabel's. Eren had followed him into this, just like her. He had trusted him to get them through and he had left him behind. Sure, it hadn't been purposefully, nor by choice, but it had happened all the same.

If Eren died his death would be on Levi. Another loved one, gone because Levi--who was meant to be Humanity's Strongest--was too stupid and powerless to stop it.

Fingers tightening on the reins in his hands until he could swear he drew blood, Levi pushed on.

Still cast in shadows and mist, but with no rain now, Eren stood back to back with a tree, his dying horse in his sight. Unable to see much else but a small circle of earth, scuffed and marred with both his blood and his horse's, Eren closed his eyes. The small rumble of thunder was still in the distance, the occasional flickers of lightning lighting the sky every now then, but the world around him seemed quiet, as if holding its breath.

With eyes closed and hands in fists at his sides, Eren slowly took a breath, in through his nose and out through his mouth. The air smelled of rain and earth and the cleanliness it always seemed to get after a good storm, but under that was a stain of black that set his instincts of edge. Eyes still closed, Eren slowly relaxed a hand, smoothing his fingers from their tight posture. Just as slowly he raised that same hand, bringing it to his lips. He did not need to see, he could smell them.

The titans were coming.

* * *

At the first footprint Levi allowed himself to think of it as coincidence. On the second, he had to consider the possibilities. On the third, fourth, fifth and every one following, he had to face the fact that he was probably about to live out his worst nightmare.

Following the trail of tracks, his heart seeming to crawl up into his throat with every stride, Levi wanted to turn around. He didn't want to see what horrors would await him at the end of this sick path, did not want to see Eren, his charge, his soldier, his lover lying in a pool of blood with a circle of titans around him. He did not want to have to carry the body back, did not want to have to face the rest of his squad, did not--

It took an almost-fall to make Levi realize that he wasn't breathing properly.

Eyes wide, his pupils enlarged, Levi forced his lungs into taking deep breaths, the exhales becoming more choking coughs than anything else. But still, it was air and he-- _unfortunately_ \--needed it.  
Focusing on the deep breathing, Levi stared straight ahead, unable to look at the path of footprints. _Eren was dead_ , they seemed to shout, every hoofbeat seeming to scream the words. _Eren. Is. Dead._

Dead like Farlan, half his body torn apart.

Dead like Isabel, her head the only thing left.

Dead Like Petra and Oulo and Erd and Gunther and--

Levi slipped through a thick curtain of fog, and came face to face with a bloodbath.

* * *

_Kill_. He chanted, baring his teeth in a growling snarl. _Live. Kill. Live. **Kill!**_

Turning fast, he slammed a fist into the foolish Titan that thought to take a bite out of his hip. Its bones crunched under his hand before with a shudder it fell at his feet, a steaming hole where its face had been. A stomp to its nape had it down for good, and a surging burst of triumph made him roar, the sound blending with a streak of thunder.

A growl answered him, making him whirl to his left. An ugly looking face with fat teeth and bulging eyes stared back at him, and Eren readied himself.

 _More_ , he realized, snarling back. _Kill more. Live. Kill all and **live**._

The thought tore another roar out of him, and Eren ran forward, eager to win, to fight, to kill, to live. He _had_ to live. He wasn't sure why exactly, but he knew it was a necessity. It mattered more than killing, more than blood, more than victory.

The Titan fell with a thud.

* * *

Levi slipped off his horse, the motion more of a fall than anything else, his legs nearly giving out after so long. He was cold and shivering and standing in blood, but he couldn't stop staring at the large creature staring down at him, green eyes bright and intelligent.

 _That's right,_ he realized, the steam of Titan corpses helping to warm him. Unlike Farlan and Isabel and Petra and all the others... Eren had this. When all else failed he could retreat into the safety of a body more than twenty times his size and stronger than a hundred men. He could grow teeth and limbs that could tear a titan's head clean off its shoulders.

Levi could've collapsed with relief. Instead, he called out Eren's name.

* * *

 

There was a human below him, smaller than the horse it was riding and soaking wet. Its tiny voice called up to him, making his ears twitch.

There were no more titans in the area, the remains of the one's that had come for a meal lying in parts at his feet. It made him question why he was still standing there, but some part knew that that was what he had to do. The part that told him to live.

The human made another noise, something that sounded familiar, and he made a grunting noise, glancing down at it. At the attention it waved an arm, seemingly agitated when he did nothing.

With a huff of air at its strangeness, he lowered himself to its height, eyes nearly level with its head. He made a questioning sound when the human stared at him, large hands planted on either side of it.  
It repeated the noise, seeming to frown at him, and he blinked slowly in answer.

Giving a laughable version of a growl--really, did it find itself _intimidating_?--it said it again, louder and more impatient.

The syllable seemed to mean something to him, and he tilted his head to the side, a tickle at the edge of his brain telling him that this human was saying something important.

"Eren," it said again, stressing the letters and drawing them out. "Don't make me cut you out."

 _Cut?_ He gave a soft growl of confusion. _What did cut..._

It said it again, with more force and less patience, and suddenly he remembered.

 _Eren_. His name was Eren, and he had lived.

A touch against his cheek had his eyes opening, looking down at the human that seemed so unafraid.

"Eren," Levi said softly. "Come out."

* * *

The ride to the woods was an easy one, compared to the hell they'd ridden through to get there. It seemed that the universe had decided to take it easy on them when no further titans crossed their path and the storm faded away. The only thing that truly impeded their way was the muddy ground and the fading fog, but even that was not so bad. Not when Levi had Eren cradled to his chest, safe and warm and alive, his breathing soft in Levi's ear and his skin like a furnace against his damp clothes. He was tired of course, drifting in and out of sleep with his head resting against Levi's shoulder and his legs thrown over either side of his own, but the Corporal would take it any day to what it could have been.

Eren had survived the nightmare and Levi did not have to add him to the list of people he mourned. _Really_ , he thought, a small smile curving his lips as he pressed a kiss to Eren's brow. _He should have known better by now._

**Author's Note:**

> the moral of the story: don't ride in thunderstorms. Learn from the scouting legions mistakes and don't let your friends die horrible bloody deaths.
> 
> you can hit me up on my tumblr @ my101fragiledreams


End file.
